Jealousy. It is a tough feeling to deal with. I struggle with jealousy almost everyday. Its something I constantly battle with. Its so easy for me to feel jealous. I think especially for women, jealousy is a hard habit to break. It creeps up on me so easily, and then quickly turns into an all consuming issue.
What is jealousy? Jealous is an act of the flesh. It is in the same category as immorality, deception, hatred, envy, and lust(which we’ll get to later). Definitely not something I want to get mixed up in, and yet I find myself tangled in it almost every day. For me jealousy comes in all sorts of different ways. Maybe you’re jealous of superficial things like someone’s hair, looks, or wardrobe. Maybe its because of someone’s body, or house, or salary. Maybe you’re even jealous of someones lifestyle, husband, ext. It doesn’t matter what you’re jealous of, its all bad.
Where does jealousy come from? Jealousy is of the flesh, it is not from God. Jealousy comes from the enemy, who wants to steal and destroy. The enemy loves breathing jealousy down our backs because he knows that jealousy only brings death. It can spring from our own insecurities. If I feel insecure about something in my life; my body, how much my money we make, how big our house is, whatever, then I am immediately more susceptible to feeling jealous over someone who has those things that I desire.
Jealousy is bondage. For me, because I let it control me for so long, I became in bondage to it. I had believed all the lies the enemy told me. He told that I wasn’t good enough, she was better. He told me that I didn’t make enough money, I needed more. He told me that she didn’t deserve all that she had, but I did. All lies. All believed by me. For some, bondage can be easily broken, its more challenging for others.
Here’s how I overcome jealousy.
- Pray. First thing I do is say a quick prayer like “Lord please give me an escape from feeling this way and rid my of my jealous heart.” It’s easy to remember, quick, and EFFECTIVE. The Lord will always provide an escape from sin for us, if we ask (1 cor 10:13).
- Remember what jealousy brings. Jealous brings NO life, only death (gal 5:20). It is as unyielding as the grave (SS 8:6). It bears no fruit and those who live with jealous and greedy hearts will not inherit the kingdom of Heaven (gal 5:21).
- Gratefulness. I then try to move my mind away from thinking about what I don’t have and focus on all that I do. For me, it’s incredibly harder to feel jealous when I start listing all the blessings in my life. It puts my mind in perspective.
- Encouragement. If I’m feeling jealous towards a certain person, then I like to turn it into encouragement. As women, I believe that one of the best things we can do for other women is to encourage and support them. If my friend is doing really well at something, and I start to feel jealous about it, then I turn it around and be encouraging and helpful instead. I will not let myself bring others down so I can feel bigger, even though that is what my flesh wants me to do.
I hope these tips can help you if you struggle with jealousy. If you have any other tips feel free to leave them below, I’d love to read them!
“The grass withers and the flowers fade, but the word of the Lord stands forever.” Isaiah 40:8